Beyond the Label: Why You Should Stop Saying 'I Have Anxiety'
The Linguistic Trap of Identity
When you say, "I have anxiety," you aren't just describing a feeling; you are claiming a permanent state. This phrasing fuses your identity to a physiological response, making the condition feel like an unchangeable part of your DNA. To reclaim your power, shift your language. Use phrases like "I feel anxious" or "I feel alarmed." This subtle pivot transforms a defining trait into a passing emotion. It creates the necessary distance to observe the feeling without being consumed by it.
The Myth of Capability
We often mistake the presence of uncertainty for a lack of safety. However, the alarm bells ringing in your chest aren't the primary problem. The real friction arises when you doubt your capacity to handle the situation. Uncertainty is a natural part of work, relationships, and growth. The feeling of alarm is merely a signal. The challenge is to trust that you possess the skills and resilience to manage whatever unfolds, rather than letting the alarm convince you of your inadequacy.
Understanding Separation Anxiety
Expert Dr. Russell Kennedy posits that all anxiety is actually separation anxiety. When we experience fear, we tend to go "neck up," retreating into a spiral of analytical thoughts. This mental retreat separates us from our physical bodies, our personal power, and our spiritual source. By living solely in our heads, we amplify the alarm. Healing requires us to stop thinking about the feeling and start dropping back into the body where our true strength resides.
Activating the Vagus Nerve
Your body contains a built-in off-switch for alarm: the vagus nerve. This nerve runs from your seat through your organs and vocal cords. You can tone this nerve to signal safety to your brain. Simple actions like pressing a hand to your heart, intentional breathing, or even singing can stimulate it. This is why singing hymns in church often feels grounding; the vibration in the vocal cords acts as a tuning fork, realigning your system and reminding you that you are fundamentally okay.
- Dr. Russell Kennedy
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- Mel Robbins
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- Oprah Winfrey
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- The Let Them Theory
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Stop saying, "I have anxiety." | Mel Robbins with Oprah #Shorts
WatchMel Robbins // 2:58
Mel Robbins is the creator and host of The Mel Robbins Podcast, one of the most successful podcasts in the world, and a #1 New York Times bestselling author. She has 40M followers and is known globally for practical tools on mindset and behavior change. The Wall Street Journal calls her a “billion-view podcaster,” and TIME says she gives millions “a reason to believe in themselves.” Her books are published in 63 languages. The Let Them Theory is a #1 bestseller across every major list and a top-selling book of 2025 with more than 8M copies sold. She also wrote The 5 Second Rule and The High 5 Habit, and has seven #1 Audible releases. Her company, 143 Studios, produces award-winning podcasts, books, courses, and events for partners like Starbucks, Ulta Beauty, JP Morgan Chase, LinkedIn, and Audible. She has been honored by TIME 100 Digital Voices, Forbes 50 Over 50, USA Today, Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and The Hollywood Reporter.